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5 secrets to finding happiness

Updated: Jan 30, 2022

From the desk of Paula Trotter, a certified life coach in San Antonio will shares the key to finding happiness at any age in the Alamo city.

Many people want happiness but very few actually find it because our mind is a battlefield and happiness is a state of mind. If you want short term happiness then consider booking a vacation, taking up a new hobby, or spend time doing the activities you already enjoy. However, if you want to feel happy after you return from a week in paradise then you must change your outlook on life. True happiness means you must accept certain situations that you would rather not, and you can’t depend upon others for your happiness. Today I will share with you five tips to create long term happiness that I share with my life coaching clients in San Antonio.

“The key to being truly happy is knowing that you have the power to choose what to accept and what to let go.”

How To Create Long Term Happiness?

# 1: Stop relying on others for your happiness:

If you see the world through a negative filter or look to others to create your happiness, you are in for a lifetime of misery. In order to be truly content or happy within you must master your mind, thoughts, and emotions. Many of us live our life like an actor, who wants to run the entire play. We try to arrange the scenery and people to fit our wants and needs. If the arrangement would just do as I want, then I would be happy. Life would be peachy perfect. On the other hand, if they don’t then I act______ fill in the blank. However, we haven’t the insight to see that a play ran by our own self won’t go well. It won’t make us happy because even in most of the best moment when we think like this, we create confusion rather than harmony. One of the quickest ways to create happiness, go do something for someone else rather then yourself. Stop focusing on you and you will get out of the hole of misery and self-pity.

# 2 Stop Comparing your life to others

We hear this but are we truly listening? There is nothing that will steal your happiness faster then looking at Facebook and comparing your life and relationship to others. You don’t know the behind-the-scenes footage or what they went through to reach this level of happiness you admire. My friends have a picture-perfect marriage NOW and are couples coaches but years ago struggled with infidelity and an affair that left their marriage on the brinks of disaster. Remember as you look at others not to make assumptions without knowing all the facts. If you have done something great, something you are proud of, remain proud. Everything is relative; its imperative to your happiness to remember that.

# 3 Be Present

The other day I was having lunch with a friend that was so consumed in her phone I wondered if she even knew I was there. With technology its easy for your body to be present but your mind must be there as well. Remain where you are when you are there. Don’t waste precious time or lost memories by letting your mind roam to work or worries. Be engaged!

# 4 Step Out Of Your Comfort Zone

If you remain stuck in your comfort zone you will not know what you are capable of. Many times, when you think of it, your comfort zone isn’t very comfortable at all. You remain stuck in relationship or in a career that is going nowhere rather the taking the risk. If you want to live a rich, fulfilling, and happy life then you must take risk, Step out of your comfort zone, happiness is waiting for you!

# 5 Learn the difference between wants and needs

Many people get the difference between what they need and what they want confused. The only thing you need is food, water, shelter, and air! Wants are better relationships, a more reliable car, a better paying job. Stop competing with the Jones or chasing after the next thing to gratify your elusive state of happiness. When you let go of “wants” and embrace your “needs” this leads to contentment and happiness.

I can hear you say, " Paula these things sound great on paper but what happens when the rubber meets the road?" Let me provide you with a few strategies that will get you started towards your breakthrough. A breakthrough is simply a moment in time when you find the courage to change!

Happiness Strategies From A Life Coach

Practice Meditation

Meditation brings calm to the storm ranging in your mind. While many people will claim they don’t have time to meditate you can find time to pause. Taking a few moment each day to meditate helps you find balance and balance leads to happiness. The best way to get started is to find a free app on your phone that can help you learn. If you’re at work than simply find a quiet space, shut your office door, and free your mind. Just as the song by En Vogue says, “Free your mind and the rest will follow” Its truly amazing how refresh you will fill after only a few minutes.


As a life coach in San Antonio, I am a big advocate on writing. This allows you to express yourself without the fear of judgment, its safe as its for your eyes only. Every day around lunchtime pull out your notebook and write down three things that make you happy. This can be as simple as a warm cup of coffee, the elevator that prevents you from taking the stairs, or the car with over 200,000 miles that still gets you from point A to point B every day. After you keep a journal for 30 days go back and reflect on the things that bring a smile to your face and make you happy.

Connect With A San Antonio Life Coach

If your stuck with habits and hang-ups and want help implementing these tips and dozens of others now is your chance to connect with a life coach in San Antonio that can help you improve your life. We offer a free 30-minute consultation to determine if Paula is the right life coach in San Antonio to work with. This isn’t a sales call but an opportunity to experience coaching in action. Visit us online at

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